Thriving On Your Flaws: How Your Insecurity Breathes Life Into Their Industry

Beauty is non-negotiable. While your intelligence, wisdom and personality may always stand out, none would deny being more attractive and beautiful than they are, if given an opportunity. People preach acceptance of flaws and comfort in one's skin but when it actually comes to improving their appearance, anyone would hardly step back. And that isn't a bad thing, of course. Just as you work on your internal aspects, the external ones deserve attention too.

Why it matters more than we admit

Attractiveness, no doubt, plays a major role in how people perceive you or how you perceive yourself. The Halo effect is a well known phenomenon where your physical impression and beauty unconsciously shapes what others assume about your personality or abilities. People who fit the beauty standards of a place somewhat enjoy the confidence their appearance gives them from a young age as they feel more socially included and are more consistently reinforced. This in turn helps them take more steps ahead with confidence towards success, bringing further inclusion and appreciation in society.

Meanwhile, those who do not fit a place's beauty standards might have to work harder just to be seen, let alone to feel comfortable in their own skin. Adler's concept of 'striving for superiority' tells us how people constantly try to overcome feelings of inferiority which are a result of either natural traits or environmental circumstances and try to make themselves better. 

This explains if you are born a certain way which doesn’t fit your cultural beauty standards, then, you may also struggle with feelings of inferiority and may strive to better yourself one way or the other. So, how other people perceive you matters less than how you perceive yourself. Confidence, therefore, builds from both internal and external aspects and erodes from both too. 

When Care becomes obsession 

Caring about how you look, how presentable you are or how you can improve your appearance is healthy in moderation and can genuinely help you feel better about yourself. But when taken too far, it can cost you emotionally and financially. So, where do we draw the line between healthy care and obsession? There are signs.

You start being too preoccupied with how you look which is seen in frequent thoughts about your appearance. 

• Frequent mirror checking.
• A persistent need for compliments.  
• Constant comparison to others. 
• Overspending on beauty products. And a lot more!

So isn't it worth pointing out how your insecurities may not just be emotions but perhaps also tools to extract benefits or exploit you? Do you realise how this sort of consumerism is feeding these insecurities and why this never-ending cycle does not seem to address the root cause? 

The tremendous surge of beauty and skin care products, in recent years, is telling. Countless brands. Varied designs. Endless formulations. All aimed at earning your trust and removing the insecurities. You jump from one to another. The insecurities are only away when you're using the products. The pimples, acne scars, pigmentation are all back once you set them aside. 

Sometimes, in an attempt to hide them, you end up wearing more makeup which further aggravates the very thing you're trying to conceal, making it harder for you to look at your bare skin in the mirror without compromising your self-esteem. You can't stand in front of others without worrying about their judgement. But when you realise that you only lose yourself while circling back and forth on the same path, you're already halfway there breaking out of it. 

Breaking out of the loop

Probably a work of inner work, both biological and psychological. 

If an actual skin problem persists, you first address the root cause by going for a health check-up, eating healthy and healing your body one way or the other. Prioritize your sleep, manage stress levels and environmental triggers. See a trusted dermatologist who can help you instead of spending endlessly on countless products that won't really address the cause well but make you keep coming back to them. 

If your insecurity is something you're born with, learn to live with it gradually. It probably might not be as disabling as it feels at the moment. Work on your thought patterns as you get to choose what you place importance on. Know that someone criticising you about your looks is more about where they're coming from and less about you. Look for and work on areas where you'll actually excel and which would give you a boost of confidence. Work on your personality, skills and abilities. 

As always said and holds true, beauty from within goes a long way. A kind and empathetic heart filled with gratitude will take you further than any product ever could. 

Work on your appearance, just don't let it consume or break you!