The Empathy Glitch: When Compassion Fails Behind the Screen

There's a bug spreading online, and we've all quietly gotten used to it. A norm we all are getting pulled into softy. You hop on the video of a blind man and as you slide into the comments, you read something like "But how'd you read our comments?💀" 

A similar incident recently happened to Arjun Kapoor where people took the comment section as an unregulated "Sarcastic Meme Playground" before he had to officially post something vaguely about how he's hurt about some stuff and then people finally realising they trolled the guy for nothing and must step back now before something happens to him. He ended up turning off this comments altogether. 

It's the same script with a young girl doing her make-up, vlogging or talking about her day where she's trolled sarcastically for acting older than she is. Instead of humbly mentoring or guiding a child, social media users attack her with their words as if the child is already mature enough to know everything. So many more such instances where all of their propagated empathy somewhat glitched or displayed an Error 404: Compassion not found. This is the same generation pointing out the importance of empathy on their social media handles. 

One could choose to probably overlook and not talk about it but because we belong to the same generation, it needs to be a matter of concern for us. Besides, the consequences of such reckless insensitivity would be deadly. 

Why it happens 

The more we're exposed to such cruelty without any real consequences for it, the more normal it starts to feel. Psychologists call this desensitization where repeated exposure to something disturbing gradually dulls our emotional reaction to it, until it stops being disturbing to us at all. Gradually, the entire thing moves towards normalisation and a harmful behaviour quietly becomes "just how comments sections are”. 

Most people join in because everyone else is joining in which is plain conformity. Sometimes, people might even disagree with a belief privately but would go along with it publicly. This is called pluralistic ignorance in social psychology. Privately, you might think the joke's gone too far, but publicly you laugh along anyway, because you assume you're the only one uncomfortable. In reality, however, not everyone is actually fine with it. Everybody just thinks everybody else is.

So why do people do it in the first place?

People engage in such behaviour, perhaps because it makes them sound 'cool' cracking a dark joke or gives them a false sense of superiority over the tragedy of another. Most of them may never do it in real life. It's only because they can hide behind a screen which also helps them evade face-to-face feedback. 

Moreover, the mean jokes and toxic slang let people hurt a person while pretending they only meant it as a joke or they're taking it too 'seriously' and don't know how to have fun. Another plausible but less common reason is a feeling of joy or pleasure when something bad happens to someone else, linked more to the 'Dark triad' traits called narcissism, machiavallenism and psychopathy. 

How'd you stop it, if you want to?

Firstly, know that while it affects the other person, it also exerts an influence on you by staining your own self-image and lowering your self-esteem further. It would never help genuinely raise your confidence. You lose your own authenticity by conforming to baseless and hurtful norms. You need to stop feeding on dark humour at the expense of someone else and cultivate genuine empathetic behaviour in yourself by reminding yourself that you could be in their place. 

Identify the personal triggers that make you go for toxic humour. Whether it is boredom, wanting to fit in or wanting a laugh in the replies, recognise it and stop before you enter the game. People differ in their levels of sensitivity. What doesn't have the slightest effect on you may take a very bad toll on another. Remind yourself that a real feeling human is on the opposite side of the screen. 

Trolling thrives on attention, so don't give it any, whether it's about liking a comment or replying to it. It reinforces them to keep acting the same way repeatedly. Put your energy into the comments that are actually deserving. Appreciate the positive and constructive side. 

We don't need more posts about the importance of empathy. We need to actually practice it in the one place we keep forgetting to, that is, our social media platforms.