Love Without Romance: Redefining Valentine’s Day

February 14 is when the world turns pink, filled with blushy red roses and tons of sweets going up in sales, along with elaborate social media trends that flood our pages. Rom-com films are lined up to release during this time of the year, and the hype for Valentine's Day is built up. See something common here? Valentine’s Day is packaged as something to do with romantic relations. This is the time people ask each other out on dates after all! It, however, puts pressure to maintain this “romance-date image.” But what if I were to tell you that love is far more expansive than romance alone? It exists in friendships, in chosen families, and even with oneself.

The reason non-romantic love is underappreciated is because of its lack of spectacle and sparkle. Unlike romance, platonic love is devoid of the “butterflies” and the emotions one would traditionally go through with a romantic relationship. However, that is exactly where the beauty of “love” as a definition lies. Having healthy and steady friendships, self-awareness and confidence, and even admiration for things in their purest form are all different ways love can be experienced. That’s how big the word is.

However, we as a society have failed to acknowledge it due to placing romance at the top of this hierarchy. From movies to music to social media, romance is portrayed as the ultimate achievement. Being in a relationship is often equated with success, while being single is viewed as something temporary or lacking. This thinking limits our understanding of intimacy, reducing it to merely romantic, and not anything else. Intimacy can exist in everything, from friendships to even objects. But the societal emphasis on the romantic aspect has restrained us from exploring these possibilities.

Redefining Valentine’s Day does not mean rejecting romance. It simply means broadening the definition of love. The day can be about appreciating the people who consistently show up for us, whether that is through a small message, a shared meal, or simply spending time together. It can also be about reflecting inward, acknowledging personal growth, and practising kindness towards oneself.

Love is probably one of the most complex things to feel. Maybe that's why it's so hard to confine it to a particular box of definition. Love is omnipresent and exists everywhere. Perhaps Valentine’s Day does not need to be limited to couples and candlelight dinners, but can instead serve as a reminder of every form of connection that sustains us. When we broaden our understanding of love, the day becomes less about performance and more about appreciation.